ComedyCollective Writers Project
Kim Morrissey

BBC Radio 3 cast: Lesley Sharp, Clive Merrison, Edward deSouza
London stage cast:  Jo McInnes, Barry Shannon, Simon Hewitt
Regina cast:  Kim Nedoborski, Jim Timmins, Gregg Morley
original director: Steven Gregg

Scene from Dora:
wherein Herr Doctor Freud
can find many, many words
for a man's member,
and no word at all for er, um ...

"A powerful piece of theatre" -- Michael Palin

"At last, a feminist play about Freud - and it's funny too! -- Lorna Crozier

Please note: the BBC Radio 3 production of this play is available through BBC World Service. The book is available, world-wide. ISBN 1-85459-295-5

from Act One:

FREUD.  Dora?

DORA.  Yes?

FREUD.  Dora, did you notice anything else?

DORA.  When?

FREUD. When he kissed you ... when he said things ... did he seem different?

DORA. He seemed very excited.

FREUD. Excited ... you mean "Physically Excited!"

DORA.  Well, yes.

FREUD.  So you do know the signs of a man who is "Physically Excited?"

DORA.   Of course .... Doesn't everyone?

FREUD.  Everyone?

DORA.   Well, don't they?

FREUD.  Tell me. what are these ... signs ... of excitement .... How can you tell?

DORA.  Well, for one thing: you can tell by his mouth.

FREUD  [COVERS MOUTH]  By the mouth - how?

DORA.   Well, when Herr K gets excited, he starts to spit when he talks.

FREUD.   And that's the only way you can tell that he's excited? I mean "Physically Excited."

DORA.   Well, of course, there are other things, too.

FREUD. [CROSSES LEGS]  What other things?

DORA.   Well, I'd rather not say ... Mama said it was rude.

FREUD.   Forget Mama. Nothing is rude in this office. You must tell me ... it is very important. Tell me exactly how you can tell Herr K is excited.

DORA.   [EMBARRASSED]  Well, he farts.

FREUD.  [LECTURES AUDIENCE, ESPECIALLY THOSE WHO HAVE LAUGHED] Flatulence. Not unknown. Note the case of Herr Von F. Budapest, 1894. [TO DORA] ... Go on.

DORA.  That's all there is.

FREUD.   Look at me, Dora. You did not notice his Member?

DORA.   His what?

FREUD.  His Member ... his John Thomas ... his Man Below Stairs. [DORA LOOKS BLANK] His Flagpole, his Wiener, his Schlong ... his Penis ... [IMPATIENT] His Peter, His Prick, His Cock. You did not notice?

DORA.   Well ... no.

FREUD.   No?

DORA.   No.

FREUD.  But you know now, don't you. You know what a man's Member is, don't you?

DORA. Yes.

FREUD. And you felt it, did you ... when he pressed you .... when he pressed you by the staircase ... when he pressed you by The Lake?

DORA.  No! I didn't! I swear I didn't!

FREUD: You didn't feel it when he pressed you here ... or here ... or here ...

DORA:  [BREAKING AWAY] No I didn't. I didn't! I couldn't! I -

[SURPRISE. THEN EMBARRASSMENT] Oh dear - Excuse me. May I use your [EMBARRASSED] ... your ....

FREUD. You mean the ...?   Ah. Of course, of course!

DORA EXITS.

FREUD: Note that from the very beginning I used the greatest care not to introduce the patient to any new information in the area of sexual  knowledge. I only gave a thing a name when her references to it became so clear that there seemed  to be very little risk in translating it into direct speech. Note also the Widerstand, which is to say, the resistance to admitting physical contact took place. Such vigorous denial is often a syptom of repressed knowledge.

DORA ENTERS.

FREUD: Ah, Dora, back from the ...[COUGHS]

[SCENE CONTINUES]